Author Topic: Do you identify with your face?  (Read 1385 times)

triot

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 89
  • Karma: 15
Do you identify with your face?
« on: January 29, 2017, 11:56:37 PM »
When you look in the mirror, what do you feel? Do you acknowledge that the face in the reflection is you? I was just wondering because I had psychology classes when I was still in school and we were talking about identity and what an identity compromises. Usually people accept their face as a part of their identity, thus they don't want to change it (even if they see themselves as "ugly") because it would take away from they identity whereas people who don't feel like their physical being represents their identity change it, for example transgender people who often envision how their physical being should look like, which causes "gender dysphoria".

And I actually have some kind of theory here. When people seek surgeries to change their appearance,people often and quickly judge it as "Dysmorphophobia", which actually is the "fear" or the conviction, that specific parts of their face/body are ugly/disfigured. But I actually never heard of "body dysphoria" and even though the word dysphoria means something else, drawing the analogy from "gender dysphoria", could it be that instead of being convinced that a part of your face/body is ugly, you just do not identify with your physical being? If so, is the surgical approach of changing your face more justified (because it certainly is for transgender people).

Do you envision a different face when you see yourself? How different is the envisioned face from your actual one? Does the thought cause you "dysphoria"?

This whole thing probably makes no sense, but I haven't slept all night and these are just random thoughts which I may have not written down in proper English (I'm on my phone, I wont check). :D

Lord-of-the-Cartilage

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 89
  • Karma: 43
Re: Do you identify with your face?
« Reply #1 on: January 30, 2017, 02:50:12 AM »
What you wrote makes complete sense, no I don't feel that I look like the real me yet, the person that goes with my personality. I have said to anyone that criticizes me for not liking my face, that they wouldn't dare to criticise a transgender for being trapped in the wrong face, so why am I wrong for suffering the same concept.
I'm not trying to look beautiful even, I can see the face that is the real me, it's quite sinister, noble and older looking. It's not a matter of waiting to age, I won't look like that when I age without more procedures.
Harvest, Harvest, Wherever You May Be; I Am the Lord of the Cartilage, Said He.

jawregret

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 42
  • Karma: 4
Re: Do you identify with your face?
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2017, 03:05:07 AM »
I have had surgery already. I'm 7.5 months post-op.

I might be in the minority here, but I really dislike the outcome of my surgery and hence do not identify with this current post-op face.

Whenever I imagine myself it's with my old face, so it's always a very jarring and disturbing experience to pass a reflective surface and see the new one. I can attest to not thinking that my face was beautiful before, but I feel like I lost an integral part of myself in this whole process, which I deeply wish I could get back.

UKMaxfac

  • Guest
Re: Do you identify with your face?
« Reply #3 on: January 30, 2017, 07:45:30 AM »
Have no understanding of trans person issues and dont care frankly, but for me personally I have clinical depersonalization, meaning I feel generally very detached from my mind and body and emotions. So in this way it's been easy for me to conceive of changing my face.

I see my childhood self as the real me, before I became deformed. My face from 14-15 onwards I don't think of as 'me', because that person is ugly, whereas the child was cute.

When I look in the mirror I just feel incredibly frustrated and helpless, because 1. I don't have the money to fix it, 2. I'm at the mercy of surgeons (one of whom already botched me), 3. I should have become good looking but instead I turned out looking nothing like I expected to.

I also feel intense confusion and jealousy because it seems like everyone just looks like more mature versions of their childhood selves, whereas I look like a COMPLETELY different person.

Icy

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 86
  • Karma: 6
Re: Do you identify with your face?
« Reply #4 on: February 07, 2017, 02:52:42 PM »
Have no understanding of trans person issues and dont care frankly, but for me personally I have clinical depersonalization, meaning I feel generally very detached from my mind and body and emotions. So in this way it's been easy for me to conceive of changing my face.

I see my childhood self as the real me, before I became deformed. My face from 14-15 onwards I don't think of as 'me', because that person is ugly, whereas the child was cute.

When I look in the mirror I just feel incredibly frustrated and helpless, because 1. I don't have the money to fix it, 2. I'm at the mercy of surgeons (one of whom already botched me), 3. I should have become good looking but instead I turned out looking nothing like I expected to.

I also feel intense confusion and jealousy because it seems like everyone just looks like more mature versions of their childhood selves, whereas I look like a COMPLETELY different person.

I totally get that, I felt exactly the same way before my surgery, like I was deformed and almost inhuman - body dysmorphia is powerful indeed. After my procedure I do feel that I identify with my face again in a way that I haven't since childhood, but I'm very happy with my results. The change to my features seems minor to everyone else, but the effect it has had on my self-perception has been incredible and I for one am very happy I went through with it.