Author Topic: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'  (Read 4385 times)

Juliaaa

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Hello guys! I am still deciding what to do with my jaw/chin issues. I have visited a couple of doctors but there is something that really bothers me so much!! Whenever I start to ask questions that imply that have some basic knowledge ( i.e.. vertical growth of my mandible, class 2, etc, and basic stuff) they react as if you were a weird obsessed person. I really dislike this attitude some much and I wonder if it is just a cultural issue (I am in Mexico btw) or if this is standard....

I mean it seems to me that doctors would love to encounter someone with no knowledge at all so they don't even have to answer your questions... One of them even said to me : "one has to be very careful with difficult obsessed patients like you". I swear I tried to be as polite as possible and I was just asking questions regarding his opinion of how many mm of advancement to my genio, and how far will I be from the ideal chin projection.

The other one even said to me: "I won't tell you type of plates I will use with you `cause you'll go and google all that and I don't want you to be worried"

I am very pissed off cause I don't trust them anymore and I am just speeding so much money on first consultations...

Are you in a similar situation when you ask questions about your cases,etc. ???

nrelax11

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #1 on: August 11, 2014, 10:30:56 PM »
Maybe you just need to keep looking for the right surgeon. Mine loved that I knew so much about my surgery and said I should teach his future patients lol. He was joking, but it shows that he was impressed with my knowledge and thought it was a good thing. Just keep asking the questions untill you find the right surgeon or maybe just play dumb. Its up to you.

Juliaaa

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #2 on: August 11, 2014, 10:39:24 PM »
yeah I find it so sad to play dumb... I even tried with the one who said I was really difficult,  I just asked him questions trying not to use any medical term or stuff, but he noticed :S ...  I find it so irrational from doctors to believe that it is not normal to research about how your face will end up looking...  It is so nice that you found that doctor,  I believe that all of them should have a similar attitude and not expect you to be super dumb...


MrFox

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #3 on: August 11, 2014, 11:47:02 PM »
They probably think that there is a greater risk of dissatisfaction with you compared to patients that haven't researched anything and will take whatever they have to say as gospel.

Juliaaa

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #4 on: August 12, 2014, 12:04:20 AM »
They probably think that there is a greater risk of dissatisfaction with you compared to patients that haven't researched anything and will take whatever they have to say as gospel.

But does that happen also when they are top surgeons??  I really wanted this doctor to be my surgeon, (the one who called me obsessed), I paid so much for his consultation, he is supposed to be one of the best in Mexico.. now I don't know what to do.

MrFox

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #5 on: August 12, 2014, 12:15:41 AM »
But does that happen also when they are top surgeons??
Sorry I've no idea... personally it would worry me.
Maybe when you demonstrated some knowledge, their inflated egos felt threatened :)

Juliaaa

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #6 on: August 12, 2014, 12:16:29 AM »
I have encountered similar reactions from some dentists/orthos/surgeons, SOME, not all. And I'm in USA. One practitioner said I probably know more about occlusion and jaw issues than some of the dentists he knows. He respects what i have to say etc. But i've met some who treated me like i'm so stupid...one actually said well I don't tell you about this-and-this because you wouldn't understand anyway. Uggh.

I also came across some doctors instead of replying to my question, they abruptly ask me what i do for a living, lol, i guess instead of thinking about answering my question, they were thinking in their head about judging me. I do think that women in general would have a harder time with getting respect at consultations or during treatment, especially minority women. This certainly has been one of the things that made it worse for me.


I've been there. Like I did not fully write the whole story with another "TOP" surgeon. He also started to ask me what do I do for a living, explained nothing about the procedure and started criticizing my clothing style like analyzing me as if he was a psychologist. The conversation ended up with him telling me about his trip to Turkey, and non-sense like that. He is very old, I guess it is just some old school thinking. But you are so right, maybe it has to do with some gender issues as well...

So at the end what type of surgeon did you choose?

Juliaaa

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #7 on: August 12, 2014, 12:24:44 AM »
Sorry I've no idea... personally it would worry me.
Maybe when you demonstrated some knowledge, their inflated egos felt threatened :)

I just wished they were more humble, more sympathetic... I guess I am going to have a hard time finding the one... it is more complicated than dating haha

Gregor Samsa

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #8 on: August 12, 2014, 11:52:17 AM »
He also started to ask me what do I do for a living, explained nothing about the procedure and started criticizing my clothing style like analyzing me as if he was a psychologist.

That sounds a bit bizarre. Did he say your clothing was not appropriate for a public setting or something like that, or did he just criticize it in general?

Juliaaa

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #9 on: August 12, 2014, 12:46:04 PM »
That sounds a bit bizarre. Did he say your clothing was not appropriate for a public setting or something like that, or did he just criticize it in general?


I was wearing my harem pants, my friend brought them from Turkey, super comfy for the summer. So he just told me that what were that kind of clothes for a young lady, that I should show my curves with tighter pants, that I should not be hiding myself.... something really sketchy and non-sense like that. I was like I am not going to put on a skirt to come to a consultation with you.

I don't care if this a bit tacky, but he's name is Antonio Fuente del Campo...

Gregor Samsa

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #10 on: August 12, 2014, 03:52:54 PM »
That's not an appropriate comment to make. I'd stay away from someone like that.

Tiny

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #11 on: August 12, 2014, 04:41:46 PM »

I was wearing my harem pants, my friend brought them from Turkey, super comfy for the summer. So he just told me that what were that kind of clothes for a young lady, that I should show my curves with tighter pants, that I should not be hiding myself.... something really sketchy and non-sense like that. I was like I am not going to put on a skirt to come to a consultation with you.

That's gross, but I think that kind of attitude is not uncommon in South and CCentral America.  I've heard it's pretty chauvinistic and women are 'expected' to make a lot of effort and show off their bodies etc.  Brazil and Venezuela have some of the highest cosmetic surgery in the world.

Anyway - many surgeons have god complexes and are insanely arrogant, They think they're always right 100% of the time.  They want to do what they want to do and don't want any suggestions from the patient which is stupid because it's your face.  My first rhino doc (a supposed expect and top surgeon) was like this and my result was less than ideal, but he kept saying it was great because he didn't want to admit that it wasn't. (I got a revision and now it's fab)

IMO this kind of surgeon is to be avoided because if the result isn't good they will never admit to it - a lot of people had this issue with Mommaerts, for example

LoveofScotch

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #12 on: August 12, 2014, 05:54:39 PM »
Juliaaa,

Yikes, that's not an acceptable thing for a doctor to say to a patient. (My body just recoiled reading what he said to you.) I have only worked with doctors in the US, so maybe that's normal behavior elsewhere? I lived in Miami for a very long time (where it seems like everyone is Cuban, or from Latin America...OMG, gorgeous people), and I've never had a doctor be anything less than professional. With that said, I do think 'professional' is different with every specific culture. Regardless, what he said is NOT alright (unless he's some secret, amazing fashion guru on the side), and if that's the case, he probably shouldn't' have access/authority to rearranging your face.

I've seen more doctors in my time than I care to admit, and not once have I gotten any pushback from my laundry list of questions. I may just be lucky, or it could be because I'm apparently terrifying when I'm mad.

Good luck, Juliaaa. For what it's worth, it's your body and your face. Do what you feel is right for you.

Alue

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Re: how do doctors react to your questions during first consultations??'
« Reply #13 on: August 13, 2014, 07:11:28 PM »
Hello guys! I am still deciding what to do with my jaw/chin issues. I have visited a couple of doctors but there is something that really bothers me so much!! Whenever I start to ask questions that imply that have some basic knowledge ( i.e.. vertical growth of my mandible, class 2, etc, and basic stuff) they react as if you were a weird obsessed person. I really dislike this attitude some much and I wonder if it is just a cultural issue (I am in Mexico btw) or if this is standard....


I get that a lot from doctors, not jaw surgeons.  I've had a few ask me if I worked in the medical profession because I knew the jargon.  Some appreciate it because they can explain things without having to dumb them down too much, and others get touchy about it, thinking you are undermining their authority or playing your own doctor.... I avoid the latter. 

I do my research, but I also took some of the pre-med classes (pathophys, A&P, pharmocology) back when I was in college,  I didn't wind up going into the medical field, though.  The frustrating thing is when you realize you know more than the nurse, you try to explain things and they have no freaking clue what you are talking about.  Not all nurses are that bad, but I have had a few that surprised me. 

If they balk or get defensive when you ask relevant questions,  that's a bad sign. 
Edit: and yea, your surgeon sounds like a creep.