OkCupid study on attractiveness by sex

[molestrip]

Someone mentioned an OkCupid study. Here's one I found about the importance of attractiveness.

[Alue]

Yep, I'm not going to go into a big analysis, but things have changed in such a way that women judge men much more harshly in terms of facial attractiveness than the other way around.  At least when it comes to tinder and online dating.  I don't even bother anymore. 

[earl25]

let me start off by saying im not a pua hate guy....but my experience is today's women and girls care about NOTHING else but a guys looks. The hot guy who makes dumb stupid wise cracks and curses is hilarious while the ugly witty guy is an annoying creep. I experienced it first hand. In high school and in my early 20's I used to talk to girls online. They 'd be dying to meet me and couldn't stop telling me how hilarious I am...until they saw my pic, then they never contacted me again.

[PloskoPlus]

Someone mentioned an OkCupid study. Here's one I found about the importance of attractiveness.

Molestrip,

What do you care about any of this?  You're "married with children".

[Alue]

I experienced it first hand. In high school and in my early 20's I used to talk to girls online. They 'd be dying to meet me and couldn't stop telling me how hilarious I am...until they saw my pic, then they never contacted me again.

Yes!  I've experienced the exact same thing.  I'm old enough now that I just don't care anymore.  I'm not getting jaw surgery to increase my chances with women, just for myself.   

[Gregor Samsa]

Molestrip,

What do you care about any of this?  You're "married with children".

He's tired of Peggy not making him any meals.

[terry947]

these days women choose who they want, while most men settle for what they can get.  Also women wear makeup which brings then up a couple of points, while with men, what you see is what you get. No surprise the next morning.

[earl25]

these days women choose who they want, while most men settle for what they can get.  Also women wear makeup which brings then up a couple of points, while with men, what you see is what you get. No surprise the next morning.

True, also people tak men and women at their word even when it isn't real. for example go up go any guy and ask what do you want in a women. Hes going to start barking and  saying she better be a supermodel  in the face and a size 1 or ill kick the b*tch too the curb. Then in reality, he meets Jen the sweet, fun easy to talk to girl whos got an average or slightly below average face and a little chubby , she laughs easily, and he likes her and wants her.

Go up to any women nowadays and ask what you want in a guy. They will say he must have a good personality, caring, smart o and must have a sense of humor I cant be with someone who doesn't make me laugh. If they mention looks at all at best they say looks really aren't so important they fade over time and that's so shallow. At worst they say look I obviously have to be attracted to the guy. Then when Jeff the unattractive, short, sweet, funny, witty ,smart, caring,  somewhat successful guy who does charity work approach's her at best she ignores him at worst will tell him to get away creep. Then she sees steve the 6'2 tall ,good looking jerk who is full of himself and curses etc goes anywhere near her she goes nuts and desperately wants him.

[Alue]

True, also people take men and women at their word even when it isn't real.

I judge a person by their actions and not by their words.  This sometimes rubs people the wrong way.  *shrugs*

[molestrip]

@earl25 I chatted with a girl for a few months online when I was dating. She really liked me and finally made the trip across several states for our first in person date. I could tell within the first 5min of meeting she was horrified. She pretty much got out of there as quickly as she could. Yeah, it matters. But that wasn't representative of other women so I didn't let it get to me. By my experience, more attractive women were actually less shallow than the less attractive ones. I don't know why, maybe it's a property of early-20s women who haven't learned their place yet?

@terry947 Note that they go on to note that aesthetics is much less important to women than it is to men, however poor judges they are. I suspect it's also a function of age, particularly around that "market correction" age. That's when your prey is most vulnerable, if you don't mind last years' trends so to speak Personally, I find women to be at peak attractiveness in their 30s.

@Plosko True I'm married but this stuff matters in inter-personal relationships too, not to mention that it matters since I need surgery anyway for functional reasons and I can't ignore aesthetic impact. I've come from having absolutely no sense of style or any understanding of dating in general lol. One consequence of this research is that I've now noticed that my wife's nose projects slightly to one side. Not the end of the world but.. it's weird lol. True she doesn't cook, I do all the cooking in the house and I'm much better at it.

[earl25]

yeah i know tons of ppl who give the looks dont matter speech then go nuts over a good looking person

[Nataliepryor]

I disagree. I was not attracted to my husband until I realised he had an awesome personality. He is reasonable looking, going on looks alone, but not a ' head turner'.  (For the record, I'm not saying I'm hot either!!) I certainly will be after my double jaw surgery 

He is now in his 40's, I'm still 30's, 2 kids and honestly don't care one bit ....he's hot to me because he's an awesome father and husband.

[Gregor Samsa]

I disagree. I was not attracted to my husband until I realised he had an awesome personality.

You're not really disagreeing then. Research has shown that looks are almost the only thing that matters in the beginning and then personality starts to take over with time until personality finally becomes the dominating factor. The problem is that most people won't get to stick around long enough until that happens. 

[terry947]

@ tumerican - exactly. Also I've noticed that looks basically equal personality. If an attractive person is shy then he's mysterious, if an ugly person is shy then he's not confident, loser, weak etc. If an attractive person is loud, he's confident, cocky etc, when an ugly person is loud, hes annoying, obnoxious etc.

[molestrip]

Sad but true. I'll admit that when a forum member sent me his before and afters, my gut reaction was who is this freak that I'm taking advice from! He's awesome though, it's just biology at work.