visualisation - last hope

[Rico]

I do not know how I ended up like that,, but it happened

i know myself, and I know that only no postop complications may give me back my old self
no drug, no therapy,  nothing more

i know it's almost or just impossible
Regardless how hard it is, I try, using the rest of my strength ,to visualise how this nerve is regenerating to 100%
It's 5th month and I got only about 66% of feeling... after surgery where this nerve could have been stretched much less (overcorrection / too much movements)

it's not enough... to get rid of the postop complications probably I need revision, which will cause second damage to my nerve

i can't change thinking, like you can't change homo to hetero. it's deep in my brain
i can't have any functional issues...
and noone will understand this

i'm here because of my and doctors errors
1) overlooked fracture
2) bad surgery - I chose wrong surgeon.. i had better options - i now know that

it's too hard for me.. how to expect miracles...

[Rico]

[Rico]

Thx for info

Angelina Jolie is gonna die... i recently read.  She has real mental problems.  If you have too much problems with your health then it's not possible to be normal/calm.

there is one bad thing about all this meditation visualisation stuff.... if it worked we would not have people with damaged spines.
what you think about that?

[Rico]

About media and Jolie you are probably right

About meditation....
The body blocks spince cord regeneration - the spine could regenerate, but the body blocks it.
S. Reeve foundation started researches about that many years ago

so there is no single person with damaged spine who can use meditation properly ? I do not believe

I'm trying to show you my rational thinking

meditation for body regeneration ?  any proof ?  especially when body blocks it by biochemical mechanism

[Rico]

I'm trying

look how close are ear structures to the joints and how delicate they looks like

i;m so afraid of permanent damages

[Rico]

oh what is going with Schumacher ?

[Rico]

  I have functional issue and correction is for 90% necessary - how would you know that it won't be worse ?

it doesn't work like that

my normal symmetry is demolished and everything works wrongly on my right side

i was not prepared for such suffering

[Rico]

When I've become older I've learnt one thing....  Different peoples' problems are not comparable

We all have different priorities in our lifes and different stories

Unfortunately I can't be strong . You do not know story of my life. I can't handle it

[thinkingme]

Rico. Stop searching at internet and talk with docs. Good docs. prof docs? I just want to say u post 2-3 new thread here everyday and its not helping. And u have so much medical information like a doctor but u are not doctor. You are wasting ur life bro. U will die 60 years later like everyone. Searching internet or talking same issue everyday never help ur regenerate and u know it. I can understand u desperate or helpless but can u fix it by ur own? If u have issue let doctors decide it. Nothing will change while u open only threads.

[Rico]

I've wasted my life already by choosing wrong surgeon

i'm looking for a doctor with my friend ..

i have one consultation per week
with tmj specialist with physiotherapist
with some local surgeons
I sent one week ago models of my teeth, some additional RTG. some specialist are gonna to make some calculations if I should have surgery or not.
I'm so tired because of that..mentally

surgeons send me to tmj specialist, tmj specialist send to surgeons ....vicious circle
but polish surgeons are not skilled in midface

so i;m gonna contact some surgeons abroad. As far I found one and I will have consultation.

it's not so easy

Meanwhile I'm sitting here.. and you are right it will not fix my problem

[thinkingme]

I've wasted my life already by choosing wrong surgeon

i'm looking for a doctor with my friend ..

i have one consultation per week
with tmj specialist with physiotherapist
with some local surgeons
I sent one week ago models of my teeth, some additional RTG. some specialist are gonna to make some calculations if I should have surgery or not.
I'm so tired because of that..mentally

surgeons send me to tmj specialist, tmj specialist send to surgeons ....vicious circle
but polish surgeons are not skilled in midface

so i;m gonna contact some surgeons abroad. As far I found one and I will have consultation.

it's not so easy

Meanwhile I'm sitting here.. and you are right it will not fix my problem

Is it hurting u or u are ugly. I remember u said u cant chew or something like this. Bro if u cant chew try soft foods till find real doctor. And when speaking with doctors dont ask them ''hey doc can u do this bone osteotmy'' Ask them how can i fix these result and tell them ur concerns. And try find a new hobbies. Just want to add if u focus a thing u feel it 100x worse. And hurts and nerves at brain not at bones. There is definition in literature i cant remember name,  u can feel pain in amputated organs. Because brain dont know u lose ur arm or leg. Same as you just try focus other things. It dont fix ur problem but it helps.

[Rico]

my hobby is sport, but i can't do it too much due to annoying symptoms from the ears (TMJD)
its kinda connected with changing pressue

I eat soft food to not damage my joints more...it changes notinhg

i have compressed ear structures by the jaw

of course im not talking about osteotomy only.. but from what i know it looks like it's the only solution as far...i will send you in PM how looks my typical mail.. check it

[Rico]

There is definition in literature i cant remember name,  u can feel pain in amputated organs. Because brain dont know u lose ur arm or leg. Same as you just try focus other things. It dont fix ur problem but it helps.

some people can't do that....everyone is different

[Rico]

I took, I try, I even changed my attitude in first mails to surgeons. (searching) Many things I applied already, but  I can't move forward

I wonder how to sleep,  i can;t takes too much drugs.  I noticed they slow down my nerve regeneration... and generally they are too weak

more side effects than positive effects

I have so high anxiety, that no drug work on me

I didn't expect such outcome... If I had known that, I would have waited even 2 years more to collect more money and go to USA, or in other place
I see myself 15y old playing football, i even could not imagine that time in my worst dream, that i will sit here in front of the comp totally devastated

i hate myself for such error I made.. even after fracture.. I so easily trusted one doctor that everything was ok
i can't watch how i loose my life, on the other side i'm not able to make any move... i need to work to earn money to have proper treatment

but i'm computer programmer - high anxiety due to complications - i can't focus

i have to be calm to work (kinda scientific work)
to work to earn money, to get proper treatment
but i need treatment to be calm
to work, to earn money

even no drug help
i'm really frightened about my life

[boyo]

start using SSRI, and get an appointment with a shrink