It's obvious that you are deeply wounded by your appearance, and that everything revolves around that. I don't know what your situation is exactly, but I can surmise a lot just based on this. I was a very unattractive teenager too, but still had a great youth. I had a big blank spot with sexual relationships - and this felt very bad, but I think it tends to dominate people's thoughts too much around this time. You aren't bed ridden are you? You don't enjoy doing things in your life? Your youth will certainly be the best time of your life, relationships or no.
Use that economic advantage, and not just for your appearance - my god. If I was in my early twenties right now, I may have ended up in the same profession, but AI (a tangential field to my own), seems really interesting. Companies like OpenAI do fellowships, get in there and innovate. It's a high demand field, but more than that, it's interesting work. Stimulate your brain and problem solve - in my early 30's I'm far more afraid of boring work than anything else haha.
That's good that you think about society. However, your comments about 'AI being good for ugly people' is just such a lame focus. Yeah, it can help with that, but it can also do a lot of good. Your focus on people who have it better than you shows that you haven't learned enough in my mind. Really? You think there aren't people who have it worse than you, who would love to have the opportunities you do? Why are you entitled to your imagined standards? Do you really think there are no females that would be with you if you worked on it? Or are you afraid they aren't what you want?
Think about this... yes, it would be wonderful if everyone had the same opportunities and could experience what they wanted, but it will take work - not just wishful thinking.
My life revolves around my appearance since it is the main thing that is limiting me from getting a relationship and being happy. I'm not just unattractive as a teenager who is a late bloomer. My craniofacial structure is terrible. And I'm 5 foot 4 as a guy. I was never treated well by guys nor girls.
It wouldn't dominate my mind if I knew that at 30 I'd have great romantic/sexual relationships. Its the uncertainty that is painful and the fact that my youth is over. Honestly I feel like my life is over too. The true time where everyone has time and energy to have a wonderful free life in university is gone. I'll be in my 30s before I know it with no romantic experience and uglier than I already am. I'll live my life grinding my day out and going back and forth to work... alone. This isn't a fun life. Its torture. Literal torture. No matter how interesting the topic of discussion is.
You can't study things that interest you if you are hopeless and depressed. I go to circles with people in my situation, but most are just average looking average height guys who just don't try. Furthermore, hearing stories of people who are having healthy romantic/sex lives just make me want to put a gun to my head and pull the trigger since for me, getting a girl to be physically into me will never happen and I'll always miss out this key experience of life to be happy.
Seriously, getting a girl to go on a date with me is like going to freaking Mars for me. And that too, failure can happen afterwards since anything can screw it up. I'll always worry about the stability of my relationship because of my looks.
It may be a grass is greener on the other side thing with other people who have it economically worse than me, but even studies have shown that to make sure that people live well and live happy is to have a good friend circle and healthy romantic relationships. And even in economic hardships it allows people to live. It makes people work through that struggle of life.
I used to wonder why billionaires etc committed suicide when I was younger. I was too simplistic and money-centered historically. And I used to buy that nonsense fed to me that "your time will come and things will just happen."
How? 22 will be my supposed "peak" age of attractiveness. And I can't imagine how worse I'll look.
I know what you mean with finding girls who like nerdy guys and who nobody really likes. But they still have the prereq of wanting me to fit some standard. I fit nobody's standards. If there aren't facial standards, there will be standards for height standards, etc. It usually takes one thing to fit someone's physical standards for a person to be contempt. I got nothing.
And is it unreasonable for me to not want to date someone with kids? Why can't I enjoy the experience of carefree road trips with an SO etc having a lot of fun, etc. Kids will complicate things there. And at 22 I don't want kids of my own let alone someone else's kids especially when often I'll be the second priority in the relationship.
Being sexually attractive isn't work and effort. That's a myth. You either have the genetics to appeal to most, have some genetics to appeal to some people, or in the rare case appeal to basically nobody. And it sucks.